No matter how much we think all the positive thoughts, meditate, pray, and gratitude journal, we will inevitably have moments, hours, or even days of being in a funk. You know those days. Whether hormonal, engulfed in bad news, or the baby has been crying for 17 hours straight…..just an awful, terrible, no good, very bad day. Here’s the good part….it’s ok! We are humans filled with a jumble of emotions. Sometimes they catch us off guard and wreak havoc on our otherwise balanced temperament. As long as you’re not unable to get out of bed for days on end….or having really nasty thoughts (in this case, please seek help right now), it’s completely normal. If we were meant to be beams of stepford sunshine all the time, we wouldn’t have been created with such an assortment of moods. If you’re having one of these days, the first step is to accept it. I am the worst at feeling an emotion, and then feeling guilty for feeling said emotion. What follows is an awful mental session of beating myself up for being “off”. Don’t do this…future self. Embrace the moment for what it is, acknowledge that it will pass, and then let it go. Alright. You’ve come to terms with the fact that you’re a functioning human. Now what? Often times it’s Rosé, Twinkies, or some form of lashing out that can erupt as our brains concoct ways to “feel better”. The problem is that now we’ve got a headache, expanding hips, and regret to deal with on top of the funk. Pick a healthy alternative to pull yourself up with and watch how your mood will often follow suit. Here are my five tried and true suggestions:
- Get Outside. Nature has a way of fueling our soul. Now, I’m not saying you have to get drastic here. I’m far from a “let’s lace up the ol’ hiking boots and pack the portable toilet” kind of gal. You don’t have to go off the grid to enjoy what Mother Nature has to offer. I am currently writing this on my back patio. Yes, I can slightly hear some construction and traffic. But, I can also feel the breeze and the sunshine, hear my windchime and the chatter of hummingbirds, and watch as the branches from my two small suburban trees gently sway. Even if it’s 30 minutes in your car on your lunch break with the windows down, or a quick stroll around the block of your building. If the temperature is just unbearable, at least sit next to a window and soak up some Vitamin D. Find some way to make it work as 20-30 minutes can make a huge difference. This also is a great solution if you’re having a mental block of some kind. Nature is inspiring and may help you come up with your next big idea.
- Get Up Off of That Thing. Yes, you can dance ’til you feel better, but you can also walk, jog, do Yoga, or hula hoop. Move that amazing, healthy body of yours. It does a hell of a lot for you, so repay the favor and do something for it. Exercising causes your body to produce endorphins and serotonin….the happy hormones. You remember Elle Woods’s famous quote: “Happy people just don’t shoot their husbands.” There’s a reason for this line and every workout guru ever who told you that exercising makes you feel better……it’s true!!! It clears your mind, makes you feel good about yourself, and actually boosts your energy levels. The key is finding something you actually enjoy. We overcomplicate so many things in our lives. Moving your toosh does not have to be one of them. If you hate running, or CrossFit, or spandex, then don’t do it! If you love to dance, power skip, or jog with your dog then do that! There’s no one size fixes all here. Figure out a way that you enjoy getting some movement in and do it for 30 minutes. See how you feel.
- Get Away from Your Phone. Technology is a wonderful thing. You will not soon find me in a hut with no running water, electricity, or wifi. HOWEVER, constant connection and over stimulation is no bueno for your mood. Whether inundating yourself with news or sub-consciously playing the comparison game on Instagram, it brings us down. What’s even worse is the fact that it’s addictive. We pick up our phones on auto pilot in any moment of stillness. I am a stay at home mom/ writer and I have a four year old and one year old. I try my best to limit the amount that they see me randomly on my phone. So, I have always been aware. However, with the recent back and forth on social media about the vaccine, I’ve chosen to only get on these platforms once a day and I love it! I feel liberated and enjoy being slightly less “in the know”. It takes practice and intention, but you can break the habit….and be better mentally for it!
- Get Something Fun on the Books. Whether it’s a picnic at your favorite local vineyard or that trip to Tahiti you’ve always wanted to take, start planning something. Having an event in the upcoming future to look forward to will instantly make you feel excited. You can browse new restaurants, plan out your outfit, look at hotel rooms, etc. You have now tricked your brain into happy mode because you’re thinking all the thoughts as if you’re actually doing the thing. Visualization is powerful and imagining going to your happy place helps get away from the negative thoughts of today.
- Get a Feeling of Accomplishment. Do something, anything, that feels productive. I am the queen of bogging myself down with too many “to-dos” and then feeling a bit paralyzed trying to decide which to do first. Here’s a huge secret: as long as you and your family are fed, clothed, healthy, and housed, everything else on the list is pretty much an even tie. So simply pick one thing. Organize the hall closet, plan out your meals for the week, write 500 words for your next blog post, clean out Munchie’s hamster cage. Whatever. Just pick one thing from your mental swirl and cross it off the list. Feeling like you’ve put a dent in the never-ending pile will make you feel better. Sometimes you have to drag yourself off the couch, but you can always return in an hour feeling much lighter.
I’m gonna sneak a 6th option on here as a surprise nod to your human self. Cry or yell. If you’re feeling gloomy, irritated, frustrated, or defeated, you can often release it from your body in a physical way. I cry all the time. Ironically I’m a pretty happy person, but also extremely emotional. The great thing that I learned after losing my dad is that you can’t cry forever. You can do it frequently and in extreme ugly bouts, but then it passes and you almost always feel better. Crying is something our bodies are designed to do as it is cathartic. Don’t suppress it. You’re not a hero if you can hide your true feelings. You’re likely just stuffing it down where it will lay dormant until that one toe gets stubbed and the Cracken is released! If crying doesn’t come naturally, try yelling into a pillow. Don’t scare the kids or the neighbor’s cat, simply excuse yourself, lock the bedroom door and scream and punch that pillow to your heart’s content. This may even activate that crying muscle you haven’t exercised in a while!
What do you do when the blahs set in??
